What Makes a Kind Leader
A kind leader is:
- Direct and honest, but never demeaning.
- Clear with expectations, but patient while people learn.
- Strong in decision-making, with empathy for how decisions impact others.
- Inclusive, making space for voices that often go unheard.
- Aware of power dynamics, and careful not to misuse them.
- A listener, even when the feedback is hard to hear.
- Accountable, including for their own behavior and impact.
- Encouraging, especially when someone’s doubting themselves.
- Respectful, regardless of role, background, or opinion.
- Human, and okay with showing it.
A kind leader is not:
- A pushover.
- Afraid of conflict.
- Over-accommodating to avoid discomfort.
- Quick to please at the expense of fairness or transparency.
- Naively optimistic or passive.
- Letting poor behavior slide in the name of “niceness.”
- Performative. They don’t just talk about kindness, they live it.
If you’re still with me, let’s talk about the courage it takes to actually use the word kind at work.
Integrating Kindness Into the Workplace
It takes guts to say it out loud. To name kindness as a leadership value when you’re speaking to colleagues, teams, or executives. To put it in your learning programs, build it into performance management processes, and weave it through your values and culture initiatives.
The truth? Some people will give you side eye. Some will assume it’s soft, or off-topic, or not serious enough for “real business.”
But kindness is serious business. It directly impacts the bottom line.
I believe most of the employee experience is shaped by how we’re treated by the people we work for and with. When people aren’t treated well, they leave. And that turnover? It’s expensive. Recruiting, retraining, lost knowledge, lost momentum, disengagement, and sometimes even damage to the company’s brand.
On the flip side, people who feel valued and respected stay. They collaborate better. They work with their teammates, not around them.
And being kind at work? It doesn’t just fall on leaders or HR. It takes everyone.
People don’t just want kindness at work from their manager. They want it from their peers and colleagues, the people they spend most of their day with. That’s why kind leaders don’t just model kindness. They build it, they nurture it, and they expect it across their teams.
Let’s also remember that while people want to be treated with kindness, what that looks like can vary, and that’s okay. A human being comes to work, not just a job title. Each person brings a whole history of experiences, values, and preferences that shape how they show up.
For some, kindness means checking in, listening, sharing, and connecting. For others, it’s simply being treated with a baseline of dignity and respect, and that’s perfectly valid too.
At the end of the day, every human being wants to be heard, seen, valued, and to feel like they matter. That’s the heart of kindness at work.
Kindness is one of the most powerful tools we have for building trust, connection, and performance. It creates psychological safety. It fuels inclusion. It opens the door for better conversations, more honest feedback, and stronger teams.
Want to Build a Stronger Culture?
Start here:
- Ask yourself and your team: What does kindness look like here?
- How is it recognized or rewarded?
- Where is it missing?
Then build from there.
So yes, it takes courage. But it’s worth it.
Join me in my webinar, The Impact of Leading with Kindness You Can’t Ignore, to uncover practical ways to lead with kindness and build stronger teams.
